Joe the Plumber, whose 15 minutes were more than expended during the 2008 presidential campaign, is headed to the Middle East to become a war correspondent. He says he's going there to deliver the Israeli perspective. I think I've heard an adequate amount of both sides of that argument from the boring media. I won't hear what he says unless Stewart or Colbert report on him because I'm just not that curious.
What isn't being reported on are the others that are going to the Middle East to provide their unique perspective.
Bob the Builder will be reporting on the effects of rockets and mortars on the buildings. He'll be lending a hand in the reconstruction effort. He's going to go against the grain and build quick with cheap materials because the stuff he builds will only need to last a week or so until the next rocket, or mortar, or car bomb, or whatever knocks it down again.
Dora the Explorer will be going there on a peace mission. By teaching them basic Spanish expressions, along with math skills and music in a very interactive environment, she might get the two sides to finally come together in peace. If not, the answer to peace in the Middle East is probably floating around somewhere in that backpack of hers.
Thomas the Tank Engine will be on the scene. He won't be doing much as there is not an overabundance of railroad tracks in the region.
Hopefully we won't have to hear much about Joe the Plumber's antics in the Middle East. If we do, I'm going to suggest that we send somebody to interview him. I'd like it to be another FIRST NAME + THE + DESCRIPTIVE WORD(S). I think the person who would be best suited to this task would be Vlad the Impaler.