Fierce Urgency: I don't even know where to start with this one...

Disclaimer 1: This article promotes neither the pro-choice nor pro-life movement. Try to follow the bouncing ball.

Disclaimer 2: I have two dogs and adore them. I openly do not support the organization PETA although I oppose those who mistreat animals. PETA and I draw the line of what constitutes mistreatment in two very different places. I like steak and chicken. If you kick your dog or cat, I think I should get to hit you in the face with a baseball bat. People who starve their animals and leave them locked in cages with their own waste for weeks on end should have to suffer the same fate for however long they may survive. That should give you a general idea of the difference.

Disclaimer 3: I don't care as much about the Super Bowl as a pig does about Sunday. The best thing to ever happen as a result of the Super Bowl is the movie Black Sunday.

The Super Bowl people turned down an ad which promotes the pro-life cause on the grounds that they have decided not to air political or advocacy ads. I don't know if that reason is bull or not. I also don't care.

I'm glad they're not airing the commercial because, and only because, I hate poorly supported arguments. The ad outlines the life of Barack Obama and then points out that despite all this hardship, he grows up to become the first African-American president of the United States. The supposed moral of this story: no matter how hard the child's life may be, abortion isn't a good choice because you don't know what the child may go on to do. I've heard this one before except in that story you're killing Ludwig von Beethoven by choosing abortion.

The trick with these stories is to paint a bleak picture of what a child's future would look like if born. The idea being that when someone says, "Do you think this is a good case for abortion," they can spring the end of the story on you. This is an unconvincing argument for the following reason...

Child is going to be born into a violent family situation and have a difficult childhood. Good case for abortion? No? Damn! You just missed killing Adolf Hitler.

What about the child who is born to an young, unwed mother but eventually has a stable childhood including a step family and strong church involvement? The child is shy and awkward but does graduate high school and go on to college. Are you convinced an abortion is a good idea here? Pity! Ted Bundy lives on.

The argument isn't bad, it's just very weak. It invites being shot full of holes. Both sides of this debate have significantly better arguments in their arsenal. This argument is like marching toward a machine gun nest with nothing but a pitchfork.

This story has another side.

The organization that tried to get this ad aired became irritated when the Super Bowl people said they would air an ad by PETA if they would tone down the sexuality of the ad. There goes no advocacy ads. The PETA ad is stupid. It's 30 seconds of my life I'll never get back and I resent it even more than the two hours I lost watching Fight Club. Find it on YouTube yourself. I'm not even posting a link. The part that bugged me was when Brian Burch, who favored the pro-life ad said, "NBC claims it doesn’t allow advocacy ads, but that’s not true. They were willing to air an ad by PETA if they would simply tone down the sexual suggestiveness. Our ad is far less provocative, and hardly controversial by comparison,”

Burch is absolutely right. The Obama-fetus ad is far less sexually provocative than the PETA ad. Burch is absolutely wrong. The Obama-fetus ad is far more controversial. Let's check the scorecard.

How many times has someone tried to damage or destroy an abortion clinic?
How many times has someone tried to damage or destroy a vegetarian restaurant?
How many doctors who work at abortion clinics been assaulted or killed?
How many chefs who work at vegetarian restaurants been assaulted or killed?

Who dislikes each other more, the people on either side of the pro-choice, pro-life debate or the carnivores vs. the vegetarians?

Mr. Burch, the ad for which you advocate touches a much hotter topic.

A note from the author...

Dear Gentle Reader,

I do not advocate violence being done to those who are pro-choice or pro-life. I do not favor violence being done to either people who eat animal products or people who don't eat animal products. I do not advocate violence being done to the place any of these people work or live.

Furthermore, I do not advocate hitting a person who abuses an animal with a baseball bat. If a baseball bat is unavailable, a golf club, tennis racquet, or axe handle will suffice nicely.

Sincerely,